Can't stop a old man from Driving

My 90 year old father has a habit of jumping in his care and doing road trips. Read that again.

90 year old man. Doing long road trips.

The thing is, I've tried again and again to stop this. I offer to drive him (won't have it, thinks I'll kill him yet I have never had a serious accident, never had an accident or ticket at all in the last 10 years, and I have a clean license and have never even been arrested). I go with him until recently when he's scared me too much to get into the car unless it's absolutely necessary. I even went so far as to turn him into the state of Florida as an  unsafe elderly driver - but he passed all the tests. Yet he IS NOT A SAFE DRIVER.

He doesn't see everything. He doesn't here anything. He forgets where he is going and can't follow directions. Yet the state of Florida says he can drive.

What the hell is going to happen? Well, it's fairly obvious. He'll kill himself, or he'll kill someone else, or both. Worse, he might just cripple himself horribly so his final years are even more filled with pain and sorrow.

I can only pray tht when it happens, he only does himself.

You have to also realize this individual disowned me when I was ten years old and told my mother it was "up to her" to bring me up. Yeah, I must have been a bad ADHD kid at ten. Somehow I grew out of it and have never had problems with violence, drugs, or any of the typical things you might imagine an "uncontrollable child" would naturally fall into. And I've had my own ADHD son - learned how to love him without the bullshit "disowning" crap of my old man.

He's still nasty to me, mostly. I guess all families have the one member the parents dislike. But am I wrong in thinking, at least partially, that the problem is his? The nastiness, bullying personality that made an adult actively disown a 10 year old child? Something in him is seriously wrong.

I do hate him. I can't stand him. I avoid contact. But at the same time monitor and watch him closely. I have a duty and I wish I didn't have to be around him. Although he will never claim anything about what he said or admit how much he hates me (I guess for being an unruly 10 year old, since that's when it began - haven't done anything to or around him for 30 years so it can't be anything I do). He's a real problem and he's getting worse.

90 years old. State of Florida says he can drive. I can't stop him. This is a nightmare.